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After eight months, we’ve finally reached the film that started this whole ridiculous project in the first place… and now, jokes on us, we still have to watch three more Shrek movies. Join us as we discuss The Cat in the Hat, the infamous film that ended live-action adaptations of Dr. Seuss books and Mike Myers‘ career as a movie star, all in one fell swoop. We’re so ex-ciii-ted!

00:00:00 The Cat in the Hat Theatrical Trailer

00:12:22 Vulture: “Dieter: The Surprisingly Funny Mike Myers Movie That Never Was“

00:26:19 Los Angeles Times: “A ‘Cat’ with some bite“

00:28:25 The Scene of the Cat Getting a Full Hat and Tail Boner for a Picture of the Kids’ Mom that Mike Myers Bullied an Old Widow into Including in the Film

00:30:51 The Daily Herald: “How Mike Myers filled the hat of Dr. Seuss’ cat“

00:32:13 The Creepiest Thing Zach Ever Saw Related to Cat in the Hat

00:35:03 The A.V. Club: “Amy Hill on being Hollywood’s ‘go-to Asian’ and why working with Mike Myers was hell“

00:36:18 The Shoehorned “Hoe” Joke Mike Apparently Fought to Keep in the Movie

00:42:51 Lawrence (Alec Baldwin) at His Most Relatable

00:44:23 Mr. Humberfloob (Sean Hayes)’ Dumb-Ass, Loud Catchphrase

00:48:43 The Cat Appears

00:51:38 The One Truly Great Scene in The Cat in the Hat

00:57:00 Yet Another Scene Where the Cat Almost Says Something Dirty

00:58:05 The Deeply Disturbing Scene Where the Cat Has a Human Ass

00:58:35 Same Energy

00:59:20 Thing 1 and Thing 2, Eldritch Abominations

00:59:41 Thing 1 and Thing 2 from the Book; Notice How They Don’t Look Like Demonic Weasels

01:03:11 The Only Other Good Scene in The Cat in the Hat

01:05:12 The Cat in the Hat Becomes a… Canadian Hippie?

01:06:26 The Rave Scene, Shockingly Not the Wildest Tonal Shift in the Movie

01:08:50 Lawrence’s Surprisingly Grim (Not Actually) Death

01:09:25 The Cat’s Awkward Retread of the Product Placement Scene from Wayne’s World

01:10:22 “Getting Better” by Smash Mouth (from The Cat in the Hat: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack, 2003)

01:14:22 “Tangerine Speedo” by Caviar (from Caviar, 2000)